Will he have to deploy? If so, when?
This is the 5th question of a 6 part series I have been working. The original post, “Mom to mom, can we talk?” was inspired by a friend who had a lot of questions when her son just recently left for BCT. Writing the answers out has allowed me to gather my own thoughts as well as, hopefully, record some useful information for other military family members who may be searching for answers.
This question is often the most heartfelt one that any of us who are new to the military will ask. The moment we know our loved one is joining the military we instantly grapple with a new mixture of feelings — intense pride and intense fear. It took me a couple of years to fully identify with the co-mingling and inter-connectedness of these two feelings because I don’t think I had felt them together like that before.
The pride we feel is connected often with our understand of duty and our values as Americans. We love our Country, and we recognize the vital role the military has in maintaining our freedom as citizens and as a nation. We are grateful. The fear is from the obvious. Some of the fear is of the unknown. The hardest fear is what hear and see on the news.
If you are reading this entry for a definite answer, I can’t give you one. All I can do is tell you that if your soldier joined the military during a time of conflict like we have now in our Country, then you need to prepare your heart and mind for deployment. Don’t dwell on it and live in fear and dread, but wrap your mind around it now and accept that it more than likely will happen. Some soldiers never deploy, but there is never a guarantee. It all depends on your soldier’s MOS, unit, and the needs of the branch of service he/she serves in. If your soldier holds a job that is primarily a support position, never assume that he/she will not deploy. Support personnel are deployed all the time. They fill important roles in a war zone. It’s not just the Infantry or Cavalry heading over to the middle east.
I know how hard it is for a parent to wrap their head around a son or daughter going over to a war zone. I am right now wrapping my head around my son (Infantry) going back to Iraq soon, and my youngest has just joined the Army Reserves. I know they are both strong, capable and smart. My oldest is a very good soldier, and was recently promoted to Sgt. I am very proud of him. It still leaves me unsettled. I am convinced that it is just unnatural for a parent to sit calmly by why her (or his) grown child faces moral danger on a moment by moment basis. We are the providers and protectors. It’s unnatural for our children to fight battles we, ourselves, have not had to face. But, they do it all the time, and they will grow beyond us in some areas of life. It’s a unique challenge for the military parent to accept that.
When your soldier will deploy depends on what unit he winds up in after AIT and when their next deployement is set to occur. Sometimes deployment can occur right out of AIT if the unit your soldier is going to be part of is already deployed. There is no hard and fast rule about deployment. Both deployments (past and pending) my son’s date was moved ahead by months. The change in his first deployment came when the troop surge was announced. We had a heads up and knew that if the strategy was announced he would be mobilizing to deploy immediately.
Return dates and deployment lengths sometimes change depending on a whole host of reasons. The Army is trying to cut down on the length of deployments. I think right now they can run 6-12 months and sometimes as long as 15-18 months. Again, it depends on the mission, the MOS and other factors.
Be sure you get your soldier’s rear detachment contact information, and be sure your soldier lists you and your contact information with his unit’s FRG. Some FRGs send a lot of information and keep you well posted, and others do not. They are volunteer organizations, so there are no guarantees.
Perhaps a follow up post with a good checklist of what to do to prepare for deployment is in order. We can touch on the subject on how to prepare in more depth.
Be strong. Your soldier is, and he/she will do the best they can during deployment. We have a lot to be proud of as military parents. We have a lot to be fearful of as well. The best we can do is support one another, support our soldiers, and keep the home-front a safe and peaceful place for them to come home to.
CJ
July 16th, 2009 at 2:56 pmGreat post, Claire. I sent this out via Twitter. Hope you don’t mind!