This past week on You Served Radio, our guests were rock band Black Sunshine and Veterans Social Justice Founder BriGette McKoy.
Unfortunately, Black Sunshine was on the road and wasn’t able to call in. Lead singer, Matt Reardon, was otherwise busy but we’re working on booking them for a future date. Black Sunshine is opening for another great band we’ve had on You Served Radio, Smile Empty Soul, and has roots in the military. Check out their single “Once In My Life” with an intro by Matt:
Since the band wasn’t able to make it, Marcus and I discussed some current military news and we also asked the HeroMaker, Clayton Murwin, to update us on his project “Untold Stories of Iraq and Afghanistan”. He gave us some VERY good news about the project and even announced the no later than release date of the comic book. To find out when that is, you’ll have to listen to the show! In the meantime, though, PLEASE check him out on Facebook and his blog.
For the second hour, we were privileged to have BriGette McKoy on to talk about her organization, Veterans Social Justice. BriGette and I met at a Vets4Vets event this past weekend and shared contact information. I was so intrigued by what she’s doing, I asked her to come on the show and we were all lucky to have her.
Veterans Social Justice is a peer support group utilizing social media and education to inform, support, and advocate on behalf of veteran women. As we discussed, women are an underrepresented and misrepresented minority in the veteran culture and society. All too often, they are forgotten about and services and benefits aren’t provided to them based on their unique needs. BriGette was a well-informed guest with a heart of gold trying to close that gap and provide a support network for female veterans who may feel like they are suffering alone.
In November 2006, then First Lieutenant Thomas Daly arrived as part of the “surge” in Ramadi, to take part in Operation Squeeze Play, a division-size effort to remove al Qaeda from Anbar province. In this powerful memoir, he describes the successful clearing of southern Ramadi’s Second Officer’s district, the Qatana, and the uprising of local citizens against al Qaeda on the eastern edge of the city (the result of an unlikely alliance between Daly’s company and Thawar al Anbar). From the first patrol to the last in the spring of 2007, he takes you inside the daily successes and struggles of the operation and the stressful challenge of trying to discern who was a terrorist and who was a civilian. He tells the powerful and very human story of a people who want to free their country, yet have no basis on which to trust the American forces in helping them succeed.
Please go and bid on this book, which retails for $25.95 in stores (on Amazon for $17). This is must-have book for anyone interested in reading a first hand account of REAL combat (not that hokey, third person crap from bystanders and observers like Michael Yon) from someone who actually survived it. As of this writing, there is only one bid on this book at $4.99, so you can still get it cheap. Again, 100% of proceeds go to a military charity (in this case Vets4Vets). Check out a video from the author HERE about the book.
If you don’t win the auction, you can buy the book through Amazon, where a portion of sales through this site also go to charity.
Back in April, we were privileged to have Stevie Benton of Drowning Pool on the Your Served radio show. We talked about their newly released self-titled Album, “Drowning Pool”. One of the packages was a special edition “MRL: Music Ready-To-Listen, Individual” package. Today, I got my package and inside was the following personally signed letter from the band:
Thank you very much for your continued support of our music. We are truly honored to be able to share our songs with you, our friends in the military community. We are in constant awe of you and your strength and courage and we support you in everything you do for our country. We hope that our music can inspire you as you have inspired us.
Many of our songs and live performances have been directly influenced by your dedication and bravery, which drives us to give back as much as we can. We hope that this music serves as a reminder of the encouragement and faith we have for you. We sincerely thank you for your valiant efforts and hope to see you on tour so that we have the chance to thank you in person.
Once again, thank you for all you do.
-Drowning Pool
Ryan McCombs
CJ Pierce
Stevie Benton
Mike Luce
Yes, very cool. Check out the band and buy their new album at www.drowningpool.com. Here’s their latest single from the album, “Turn So Cold”.
Antiochian Village is a beautiful little resort located in the hills about an hour and a half to the east of Pittsburgh, outside the quaint little towns of Bolivar and Fort Ligonier.
Day 2 began a little too quickly as I didn’t do well sleeping last night. Not only did I forget to pack undershirts for this trip, but I forgot….my medications (let the motherly finger pointing begin). It was a touch and go night full of intermittent sleep and cold sweats for some reason. Perhaps, talking about some of the things I brought up and listening to other stories brought back some subconscious things.
Then, at about 4am, I got a call from the EOC that one of our Soldiers had been arrested for trying to sneak a girl onto post in the trunk of his car. I don’t understand that. He could have just brought her in normally in the passenger or back seat of the car. But, since he wanted to be a bonehead, he got himself arrested for something stupid and ignorant and I got a call at the wee hours of the morning.
I decided to try to sleep and skipped breakfast. Not a good idea since I was the only one that didn’t show up from the group. The rest of the group was worried about me and one of the participants that I’ve connected with stopped by to make sure I was okay. The fact is that I rarely eat breakfast even when I don’t have trouble sleeping.
The weekend was a resounding success in my mind. The retreat took place at a completely neutral location away from the hustle and bustle of normal life and allowed us to focus on each other. The building was located in the hills of a heavily wooded area and miles from the nearest highway. It included a small koi pond with some of the largest fish I’ve seen. There were also four geese that make the most serene noise. I enjoyed just walking down, sitting on the bench or leaning on the fence, and watching the fish slowly swim around while the geese scavenged for food in the well-manicured grass.
Vets4Vets is a way to get vets from all backgrounds together to discuss their experiences and help one another understand and cope with them. Through timed discussions, we were able to have equal time to discuss without worrying about any one person monopolizing the weekend. I was a little leery at first, but ended up liking the timed sessions. For one, it forced us to get to the point of what is bothering us without rambling and it ensured that everyone had equal time to speak (and listen).
At times, we broke into small groups for short and long timed opportunities to listen intently and personally to one another. The V4V staff provided coping strategies and counsel made sense at least to me. I had an opportunity to share some intimate combat experiences with other people who understand. For the first time, I was able to talk about some of the issues that I could never talk about before without just breaking into uncontrollable sobbing. While still difficult, I’m finding that talking about these experiences is truly helping me to cope with them.
The biggest take away from the event was camaraderie and being a set of ears for someone. I made some great friends, some great connections, and got away from it all for a few days. I’m going back to work recharged and ready to take care of troops.
I highly recommend that suffering veterans look into Vets4Vets.us and check out a workshop near you. They are generally held over the weekend, so minimal time away from the office is needed. I would also ask that if you are able, please donate to this organization or ask your business to sponsor a workshop. Each one costs about $30,000 and they are always looking for sponsors to bring veterans together to heal and cope. This is my plea and not an official request. Nor was I asked to make it.
I would also like to take a quick opportunity to thank Air Compassion for flying some of us out for free. We were treated better than we deserve and the opportunity to attend this workshop without having to worry about paying for a flight made the event that much more stress free. American Airlines. The staff and flight crew were top notch and uber-professional. If given the opportunity in the future, I will indeed consider American before any other airline. They even allow active duty military (in uniform or not) to board the plane with 1st Class Passengers.
I’m going to try and give a day by day of my experience as I attend this Vets4Vets retreat. Obviously, I won’t get specific about the people attending or exactly what is discussed, but hopefully give readers an idea of what the organization provides. Already, I’m super impressed.
American Airlines has a program called Air Compassion that provides free air travel to these retreats. When I got to the airport in Dallas, I heard my name over the intercom. As always, I didn’t get up right away because I never want to associate myself with a name given over a loudspeaker so I’m not targeted. It’s one of my issues.
When I get up to the counter, the pilot pulls me around the counter and thanks me for my service. He said he was a message to give me a special welcome, but no indication as to why. I explained why I was traveling to Pittsburgh and he again thanked me. One of the other employees said she wished I had come up earlier and she would have given me a First Class seat. I told her that I didn’t need one, but thanks for the offer. Just prior to this, another guy unrelated to the airline wouldn’t let me pay for my lunch.
One of the cooler aspects of this group is that they sent me a few special coins that I was supposed to give to the flight crew as thanks. Each employee was very thankful for the small token of appreciation and mentioned that it was the first time they had been given something like that. I was treated like a king, something truly undeserved. The Captain even announced my presence on the plane the resulted in one of those awkward moments where an entire flight is clapping for me. It was an uneasy feeling.
Anyway, today we travel from Pittsburgh to a place called Antiochian Village in Bolivar, PA. My only complaint is that there aren’t any nearby geocaches to find! I need to find at least one between here and there so I can add Pennsylvania to my map.
The names of three Soldiers and three Marines were added to the Vietnam Veterans Memorial in Washington, DC, in May. All six men died as a result of wounds sustained within the combat zone during the Vietnam War.
U.S. Army:
o CPT Edward F. Miles, Manhasset, N.Y. (rest in peace, sir!)
o SGT Michael J. Morehouse, Covington ,Ky. (rest in peace, sergeant!)
o LTC William L. Taylor, Tampa, Fl. (rest in peace, sir!)
U.S. Marine Corps:
o LCpl John E. Granville, Los Angeles, Ca. (rest in peace, corporal!)
o LCpl Clayton K. Hough Jr., Holyoke, Mass. (rest in peace, corporal!)
o Cpl Ronald M. Vivona, Suffolk, Va. (rest in peace, corporal!)
In addition, the status designations of 11 servicemembers were changed. Beside each name on the memorial is a symbol that designates status: a diamond indicates a confirmed death; a cross represents missing in action. When a servicemember’s remains are returned or accounted for, the diamond symbol is superimposed over the cross.
The changes raise the total number of names on The Wall to 58,267 men and women who were killed or are still missing in action.
The Department of Defense sets the criteria for and makes decisions concerning eligibility of names for inscription. The Vietnam Veterans Memorial Fund pays for the name additions and status changes.
I wanted to let you know about a helpful webinar coming up soon. The webinar, “Using Military Education Benefits Effectively- Avoiding Incidental College Disasters” will be led by Lt. Col. Paul Capicik, USAF (ret.). During the webinar, participants will learn about helpful tips on how to use education benefit options wisely and will also discuss:
- Benefit options available
- School & degree choice considerations
- Knowing your school and course policies & pitfalls
- Why communication is key
If you or anyone you know might find this webinar useful, please feel free to share and post this information. This one hour Webinar will be held Wednesday, June 16th at 1pm CDT. For more information and to register, visit: http://bit.ly/aNrsFZ
COLLETON COUNTY, SC (WCSC) -Sheriff deputies have made an arrest in connection to a shooting and attempted armed robbery of an Army specialist in Colleton County.
James Levert Davis was arrested Friday night and charged with three counts of assault with intent to kill, three counts of attempted armed robbery and one count of possession of a weapon during the commission of a violent crime.
Investigators say late Thursday night an army specialist, his wife and mother-in-law were approached by three suspects after their car broke down.
Deputies say another suspect, David Jakes, had a gun but the Army specialist fired a few shots at him in self-defense.
Jakes is in critical condition at a local hospital. There’s a warrant for his arrest.
Deputies are still looking for a third suspect, Antwon McMillian. They say he’s wanted on the same charges.
McMillian is apparently no stranger to trouble.
He’s currently out on bond for murder charges for another shooting in Colleton County from November 2009.
No charges have been filed against the Army specialist. Investigators say he was acting in self-defense.
I wonder why they wouldn’t give the Specialist’s name… How can I get him on my show if they don’t tell me his name?
In the nearly ten years that our country has been at war, our military has obviously been at the forefront of the news of how this war is affecting them. From time to time, the families of these troops are covered as well, but not nearly as much as they should in my opinion. A few years ago, I put up a video on my YouTube page that was released by the Army to honor our military families. It saddens me that this campaign was a one shot deal. It continues to get views, though, and I’m happy for that (over 113,000 views so far).
We all know that not all Soldiers are cut for the military. What seems to be overlooked, but should be taken just as seriously, is that not all spouses are cut out for the military either.
I remember when I first made the decision to join the Army and signed the papers. Emily and I were engaged at the time and separated by geography. She was still in Japan and I was in Texas. Her dad hadn’t PCS’d back to the states yet. I called her on a short phone card to let her know I had joined the Army and to say she wasn’t happy would be an understatement!
It’s not an easy life to live. Frequently, spouses are required to raise kids alone, handle difficult moves, deal with school issues, and take care of the family’s finances while the troop is deployed. It’s a LOT of stress to put on anyone, especially young and newly married couples.
Freedom isn’t free. I am very aware that there are many who have paid a higher price for our cherished freedoms, but right now, I’m feeling that the price that my family and I are paying is pretty damn high.
I think after this deployment is over I’m done paying the price. Someone else’s turn. We will have done our time.
It’s important to note – and a good learning point -that she has found ways to help pass the time during the deployment. She is reading books, reading scriptures, taking a stained glass class, and will be going to see that ass-monkey, Paul McCartney, in concert. Yeah, I said ass-monkey.
It’s important that spouses find ways to fill the time that is created by a loved one’s deployment.
The Dallas News today started covering these stories as well that focus on the impacts of families of deployed troops.
It’s the story of Aimee Ybarra, a mother of two grade-school children, whose husband came home after his fifth combat tour and told her he wanted to leave their 15-year marriage because he had gotten used to being gone. It’s the story of Lisa Bernreuther, who’s steeling herself for her husband’s sixth deployment; he’s only been home from his last tour since April. She keeps his Army boots by the door, she says, “because sometimes I forget I even have a husband.”
And it’s the story of Gwendolyn Roberts, a bright, outgoing sixth-grader and “Daddy’s girl.” When her father left for war for the third time in five years, the spark went out of her and she tumbled into severe depression.
It is no longer proper to compare the impact of these wars with the deployments of WWII. It’s a completely different time for wars that have outlived any previous combat action taken on by this country. While I’m glad that the Dallas News is covering this issue, I’m a little saddened that their focus is on all the negative aspects, ignoring those families that find way to positively deal with the separation. They are going to focus on:
• Repeated combat tours to Iraq and Afghanistan have split up marriages and forced kids to grow up without one or both parents for chunks of their childhood.
• Troops return home from combat tours with severe injuries and psychological disorders, thrusting spouses and other family members into new roles as long-term caregivers.
• Suicides in the military have risen to record levels, and the divorce rate has climbed steadily since the U.S. went to war in 2001.
I truly believe (but may be wrong) that deployments are really what you make of them. If you go into with a positive attitude, it’ll be a better experience. It might not be easier, but by finding ways to keep busy, focused on the marriage and the deployed troop, the year or so will go by faster than you know.
Try to find ways to make it interesting. Think of ideas for theme care packages to your loved one. It’s a lot of fun looking for things that fit that theme. When I was in Iraq, I got a bunch of those. A USA themed care package with red, white and blue items and candies. For St. Patrick’s day, a bunch of green stuff. A movie care package with microwaveable popcorn – that I never got to eat because we didn’t have a microwave where i was – and Jujubes. Introduce your service member to a new television series and send a different season each month. I became a huge fan of Buffy the Vampire Slayer while deployed, a show I never before had interest in. From there, I became an Angel fan. Send your loved one a recording of various neighborhood people sending greetings to him/her. If you’re at Wal-Mart ask the cashier if she’ll say something. Go to the mayor’s office. A local police officer. Your local radio show host. etc. Obviously, if you have any kids, have the kids send a greeting too. Then, send it to them in email or on an inexpensive MP3 player along with some songs that will remind you of your loved one and the deployment.
Deployments are difficult, but they don’t have to be impossible. Remember that happiness is a choice.
Since my last post on A Soldier’s Perspective, I’ve done a lot of thinking about the whole DADT debate and I think I’ve changed my mind. Sort of. Just make sure you don’t stop reading after the first paragraph or so.
I think that the ban against gays openly serving in the military should be lifted. Who am I (or who is our government) to say that someone can’t do a job simply because of their sexual orientation? I’ve always said that gays should be allowed to marry. At the very least, the government shouldn’t say they can’t. Why do we give the government the power to tell who we can and can’t love?
Opponents of the ban point to the fact that “gays have always served” in the military, so what’s the big deal? Let’s not kid ourselves, we’ve all known someone within the ranks that we suspected of being gay, but just never asked nor did they ever tell – at least not verbally. Did that alter how we acted or how we related to that person? Yes and no. For the most part, it didn’t affect the mission, but I’d be lying if I said it didn’t affect how I related to that person.
The reason I say that is because I firmly believe that homosexual conduct is fundamentally wrong! It’s wrong! It’s disgustingly, abnormally, religiously, and biologically wrong! There a reason two men can’t get themselves pregnant. The purpose of life (leaving out religious views) is to propagate the species – humanity. Homosexuality destroys the human genetic pool by failing to pass along genes to another generation. It’s impossible to do. A woman can’t get a woman pregnant and a man can’t get a man pregnant. Don’t get me wrong here: I’m talking about the act, not the actor here.
The fact that some animals do it too, so it must be normal is not a valid argument. Humans have cognitive thinking ability. We are able to discern right from wrong unlike any other species of gay animal. And to the best of my knowledge (and limited research) there isn’t a species that has dedicated gay animals. There are animals that will occasionally mount another of the same sex, but it’s not habitual or dependent.
So, while I’m adamantly opposed to the practice of homosexuality, I’m not opposed to homosexuals. I’ve got acquaintances who are gay and I’ve had Soldiers who are gay. Now, I can’t honestly say that the Soldiers I had that were gay were normal or exceptional troops. That hasn’t been my experience and those troops actually did a HUGE disservice to the whole “gay troops are just as good as straight troops” argument in my eyes. But, that is my limited experiences with the few Soldiers I’ve either known or suspected to be gay.
With that said, here’s the problem that the military faces. Well, one of many. If we are going to cease discriminating against Soldiers because of their sexual orientation, the military has got to put EVERYONE on an even playing field. I’m talking about open latrines, rooms, showers, etc. It is simply too cost prohibitive to have straight male barracks rooms, straight female barracks rooms, gay male rooms, and gay female rooms. But, if gays want “equality” there are only two options: separate rooms or open rooms. If gay behaviors are “normal” in the eyes of the military and law, then so are straight behaviors. You can’t say that gays have more restraint than strays. You can’t say that straights are more sexually deviant and can’t handle a co-ed living environment. We’re talking about sexual attraction and THAT is one thing that is universal.
So, while I have reversed my opinion on the matter, I think it is prudent that a LOT of planning, preparation and analysis go into making the decision. If the military and our lawmakers can prove that they studied the impact of allowing gays to serve openly and can do so in a manner that is fair to EVERYONE – not just gays – then I say let them serve. I won’t bring up all the other issues I’ve raised that haven’t gone away in my mind (beastiality, incest, and polygamy). I still believe that if we are going to recognize marriages between same sex couples, we need to recognize marriages between polygamists and cousins! It would be hypocritical not to.
