Blue Christmas
I posted this last year on another blog, but I wanted to dust it off and post it here. Depression and suicides are always on the increase this time of year. Please take good care of yourself, and if you know a friend who is struggling with depression, make it a point to check in with them more during this time of year. Sometimes just knowing someone cares is a huge help!
Depression during the holidays is nothing new. Thanksgiving and Christmas can be a very happy time for some, and a very lonely, painful and sorrowful time for others. Between the stress of trying to live up to unrealistic expectations, financial stress, being separated from people you love and the decrease in sunshine and time to be outdoors, the season is ripe to cause an onset of situational depression.
Military families are not immune to this problem. Depression is an equal opportunity condition. Below are the signs of depression as well as some ideas on how to avoid having a blue Christmas.
Signs:
Feeling more tired that usual
A general sense of apathy, cynicism or anger toward the holidays
Isolation from festivities and normal holiday traditions
Crying more than usual
Eating more or eating less (change in habits or weight)
Consuming more alcohol than normal
More serious signs:
Feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness or helplessness
Thinking of suicide or how much better things would be if you were to die
Inability to get out of bed, practice normal hygiene, or dress yourself.
If you experience some of the signs, and ANY of the serious signs of depression, please call your physician and schedule an appointment today. Some depression can start out due to a situation, but it can escalate into a more serious condition that needs proper medical attention.
What can you do?
Yes, Virginia there is hope! This time of year can be a serious pitt fall when you have a loved one who is deployed. There is a normal stress and sometimes even depression that comes when you are holding down the home front every day and on a day to day basis, but couple that with the message that holidays are supposed to be perfect and over brimming with joy and family and it is an awful lot for a person to handle.
First and foremost you must evaluate what is truly important to you during the holiday season. If it’s being with friends and family then make every effort to be around people. Even if you can not be around your spouse who is deployed or your parents who are across the continent from you, there are still opportunities during the holiday season to be with people. If you are new to an area and do not know many people, now would be a great time to seek out a local Church body. Another outlet for being around others during the holiday season is volunteer work at a local nursing home or other organization.
The holidays do not need to be a Norman Rockwell painting to have meaning. If you are a perfectionist and have stressed yourself to the point of burnout because things are not going the way you have planned, it’s time to put things back into perspective. Materialism and commercialism has forced a holiday rush, disappointment and disillusionment that can bring on the Christmas blues. Do what you enjoy doing, but take a deep breath and remember that you are human as are the people you love. So you didn’t score the gift you really wanted to give your husband this year because it sold out. It’s only a material object. Your health, well being and sanity are tantamount to anything that a department store could carry.
Take care of yourself! Avoid drinking alcohol if you struggle with depression during the holidays. Alcohol is a nervous system depressant and will exacerbate symptoms of depression. Eat healthy and enjoy the goodies of the season in moderation. Overeating and binge eating can lead to feelings of guilt and even anxiety over weight gain. Under eating will leave you tired, physically and mentally.
The holidays are a season, and so is deployment. Neither lasts forever, but in the thick of things it feels like both can be never ending! Make yourself a garland of red and green interlocking paper rings. Make one ring for each day your soldier has left until he comes home. Every day tear one ring off and watch as your chain gets smaller and smaller, reminding you every day that this season of separation is coming closer to being over. Hold onto your hope, and don’t allow the depression grinch to steal your joy during the holiday season.